No. 24

Be the pinnacle of country music.


Garth Brooks, who once was the man I wanted to grow up to be, is working on a five-volume autobiography. I assume volume three will be written in the voice of Chris Gaines. 

According to legend, the phoenix is a bird that rises from the ashes of its predecessor, after it dies in fiery fashion. When Garth Brooks burned out, the country music phoenix that rose from his ashes was malformed, a genetic grotesquerie that nature should have destroyed but instead —I'm losing control of this metaphor, so I'm going to switch to a new one: Garth Brooks was the face of New Country. Today that face looks like this:

(This is from  Crazyhead , a fun show.)

(This is from Crazyhead, a fun show.)

The point is, modern mainstream country music is the worst. There might be a few exceptions, but it's just the worst. Hank Williams III would probably agree:


©Alan Good 2017 (except for the images and video you fools)