The War on Xmas is a collection of short stories. You can buy it for $13, or something close to that in the currency of your choice, through IndieBound. I hesitate to tell you that you can also buy it quite cheaply as an ebook. I just don't understand ebooks. If you'd like a signed copy of a real book, you can order one through the bookstore on this website. You can read two-thirds of this book for free on the internet, as six of the stories have been published in fancy online literary journals. Links to all those stories are in The Malarkives. (All of the stories have been altered to varying degrees since their original publication.) You'll have to buy the book to read the other three. Or steal it. Not that I officially condone stealing. I don't mean to turn this into a philosophy class or an episode of The Good Place, but is it really stealing if you take something from Barnes and Noble or one of the Amazon bookstores without paying? I am just a humble writer. I won't pretend to know the answer.